"Are you making memories of moments?"   |   Tuesday, August 31, 2010





When I was diagnosed with Lupus many years ago, so many thought ran through my head... "will this kill me, who will raise my kids and how will they remember me?" I'm SURE that all these women think the same thing when they hear the word cancer. Mothers just do that.

Tracy B. was no different. She relates that after the initial, "it's not fair," that her next thought was, "who will raise my children?" Tracy is a huge scrapbooker, a Creative Memories consultant and memory keeper, as many women in households are, but she creates wonderful, visual memory books for her family. For her, it's a productive diversion from cancer and the rigors of it's treatment. Discovering her cancer at Stage 2, Tracy says, "I wish it was found sooner, but I pretty much do what I have to do, to get better and have this over with." She wants this particular memory to go away, so that she can get onto raising her two kids, and creating wonderful memories with them. When I asked what she does to get through this, she relates, "I pretty much do anything that I like, sometimes scrapbooking or getting outside to enjoy fresh air. Cancer has changed me, but yet it hasn't... I'm still me, just with cancer."

Memories. What does that word conjure up for you? For me, it's things like gardening with my Grandfather as a small child when we lived with them. It's a mental picture of my husband proposing to me. It's pictures in my mind of each of our children being born or cute things they said and did as little ones. Vacations, trips and the beauty of our daughter as she walked down the aisle.
Graduations, parties and celebrations. Generally all lovely thoughts, very few, if any sad or unpleasant thoughts. Isn't that how it usually is? We tend to remember and photograph the good things and the sad or painful thoughts pass away.... During these days of chemotherapy and sometimes painful treatments, are you looking for some small morsel of joy in each day? Trying to find something funny to laugh at? Making memories of the moments? This is a time in your life to be documented and I'm so thankful that so many women have stepped up and been Bold and Brave. We've captured some wonderful images of beautiful women, who are in the fight of their lives and hopefully, will pass through this battle and come out stronger on the other side... and this will just be a memory. How can you make it a good memory? How can you make this a pleasant memory? How can you help to make this a fun time for someone you love who is going through cancer? Send them funny cards, sending them a silly hat or wig? Hold a party for them at chemo? Create a theme for the chemo room and decorate it? Be creative. Steal ideas from someone else.... anything to make this trial a pleasant memory. To brighten someones day. To help them get through this... who knows, you may need it yourself someday.

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"It's not about the hair...."   |   Monday, August 30, 2010





Jill R. spoke right up to tell me, "It's not about the hair... It's about staying alive." Finding her own lump, just 6 short months after her annual mammogram, she speaks about the importance of breast self-exams. "You just can't always trust the mammograms and leave it at that." Exams are important, especially for younger women who don't have regular mammograms! Keep vigilant.

Jill, who has always put others ahead of herself, chose to work during her chemotherapy treatment... "I just knew if I sat down to feel sorry for myself, I might not get back up again." She knows sorrow and she understands hard and emotional work.
Dedicating herself to working with those who are mentally and physically challenged, she knows how difficult it can be. She and her husband adopted an older child with Down's Syndrome and cared for him till he passed away from complications of Alzheimer's disease at age 62. Imagine caring for a child who is older than you? Imagine the special needs he required? But she didn't hesitate when it came to where he would go as a group home closed. She has always put others needs ahead of her own...
So, it was no surprise that she chose to work with those same types of special children all through her treatment.

She also speaks to the importance of finding a support group... "only they can really help you because they are going through the same thing". They too, have cancer. Don't think that you can do this on your own... you'll need more than the support of those around you. "And you have to find the humor in it", she says with a smile that brightens the room. Somehow, I think this is a normal facial expression for her. It fits.

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Swimming upstream...   |   Saturday, August 28, 2010








Don't you sometimes feel like you're swimming upstream, and not getting anywhere....like one of those tiny pools they advertise on TV at 3am... swim and swim and swim... in a pool, not much bigger than a bathtub and getting nowhere. I need to see progress. I need some satisfaction. I got that today!!
Today was a day of catching up for me. Things with the project have gotten out of hand, photo sessions were backing up, correspondence needed to be written, my desk needed a cleaning. All the things I'm terrible at and usually put off till days like today. My beautiful daughter Emily, who may or may not have a bit of OCD... organized all my envelopes for those getting CD's and then ORGANIZED my paperwork!! In a notebook. With dividers. And sticky notes, where things need something more. Isn't that amazing??!! She and her father are BIG fans of office supplies, sticky notes and binders. She obviously didn't get it from me!
These brave women will not be defined by these cancers and peoples reactions to it and by God, I'll not be defined by the mess on my desk! I have conquered.

I'm proud to tell the following women that your CD's with your images finally went out in today's mail!!
Maureen N.
Stephanie V.
Laura G. and Mallory C.
Angie T. and Jen M.
Sharon K.
Monica T.
Sabrina M.
Lorraine A.
Thank you for being so patient with me. But, I'm thrilled that the project is still gaining momentum and the phone keeps ringing. I'm so thrilled at a phenomenon is occurring that I never considered when this blog started... you women are beginning to talk to each other, encourage each other and developing 'virtual' friendships with cancer as your common bond. ONLY you, who are walking through this journey, can speak into each others lives. We, on the outside, including your families will NEVER be able to say, "I know how you feel", unless we too receive that devastating diagnosis. I am blessed daily by your comments to each other and by the comments received by your "fan clubs."

My initial goal of "empowering women to be bold, brave and beautiful" and to face your disease head on, knowing how beautiful you ARE, is being accomplished. I can rest in that.... as soon as my desk is clear and every woman in town who is struggling with her self image and confidence during this tough time is photographed! Please keep spreading the word... we are empowering ALL women, one bald one at a time!

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"A lady and her shoes...."   |   Friday, August 27, 2010





There are lots of things that make women feel beautiful, feel special and just plain, feel good... I personally love cards. I love to buy cards, even when there isn't an occasion, but just to have. Especially the ones that make me laugh out loud in the store. I have a large box of cards that I can always go to quickly and pull out just about anything, anytime. But mostly, they are the funny ones. They make me feel good...silly huh? Anyway, my Mom always bought lipstick. She had a million, well maybe not a million, but as a kid, it seemed like that.... tubes of lipstick. It obviously made her feel pretty and good about herself.

Elizabeth T. loves buying and wearing stiletto heels. She said she wears them to chemo...EVERY TIME. "They make me feel pretty and sexy and they're fun." When I asked how many pairs she had... she rolled her eyes and said "too many." Sounds like a fun closet!! The nurses at the Oncology Center were amazed and thrilled with her choice of footwear each week...
Sometimes, the smallest things will make us happy... it doesn't have to be a new, shiny car, or a big house, or a big diamond... think about the people in your life that are struggling, think about how you could make their day a bit brighter with just a small thing... just a thought and a quick call. A silly card with a loving word. A flower left on a desk. A sweet treat when least expected. A gift card to a special place. You never know how you might make someone's day....
Elizabeth is that kind of person. She was trying not only to make her own day at chemo tolerable, but brighten the day of the nurses that were subjecting her to more of the tortuous chemical cocktails. She made them laugh.

A common thread continues to run through the lives of all these women... their faith and their reliance on family and friends for support. "I have another sister with Breast cancer too...it's difficult being separated" by distance. "I wasn't happy about getting the same diagnosis, but happiness is just an emotion that changes every day, but the joy of the Lord is my strength. That doesn't change. He doesn't change. His love doesn't change."

Elizabeth related to me later before leaving the studio... "I really haven't wanted to look in the mirror, but after seeing some of these pictures, I really do feel bold, brave and beautiful. Does everyone feel this good when they leave here?"
Maybe if they're wearing those very cool shoes!!

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"Live today like you don't have tomorrow..."   |   Thursday, August 26, 2010





How would I cope with a staggering diagnosis? What would I say? What would I do? How would my family react? What reserves of strength would I have to draw upon to cope? What courage would I have to muster? I don't think I'd react with the courage and bravery this 26 year old has.... and I'm a 50 something adult, with years of knowledge and wisdom under my belt.

It was a tough week last week, with TWO 26 year old young women in the studio. Both facing some serious struggles, but I was humbled with the fortitude they both demonstrated. I kept thinking about my own girls, 24 and 26. I can't imagine the agony of their Mothers.... Having carried this beautiful thing for 9 months, giving birth, applying bandaids to skinned knees and soothing broken hearts....but cancer is one Boo-Boo, that you can't put a band-aid on. A Boo-Boo that's invisible and is trying to kill your beautiful baby and you'd do anything to take it away or take it on yourself. Where do these kids get this kind of courage and strength?

Heather A. is facing a tough battle. She spends a month at a time, away from her little boy, in the hospital undergoing chemotherapy and then re-building her immune system. Then she goes home for a short couple weeks and then starts all over again.... trying to amuse herself in her sterile hospital room, dreaming of the day when this terrible thing is gone and she can have her life back again. AND, she continues to concentrate on the positive....despite the constant poking, prodding and isolation.
Her smile is so beautiful and her eyes say so much. It's so unfortunate that she says she's experienced such stereotyping... just because she's young, people ASSUME that she's shaved her head to 'make a statement or be rebellious'.
"People say such cruel things... I've been accused of being a racist or part of some skin-head group and I even heard someone say that I'd pulled a 'Brittany'. I'm just not the typical face of cancer.... it's not common to see cancer in young people, so people make unfair judgements and say mean and cruel things. People are just so small-minded".
Cancer CAN and DOES strike at any age. Do we make assumptions? Are we small-minded? Do we have prejudices? Try to always assume the best about people. Give those we encounter the benefit of the doubt. Like Heather, concentrate on the 50% positive of the 50/50 chances we're given.

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3 Strikes and she's NOT OUT!   |   Wednesday, August 25, 2010





You've all heard the baseball adage, "Three strikes and you're out!".... but when it comes to cancer, there are no 'outs', there is no giving up, there is no end of the inning, there is only a continued desire to fight and win the ugly thing called cancer.

Battling cancer is definitely a team effort, with Doctors and nurses assisting in the fight, being the 'trainers and coaches', but the real team is family and close friends. Sabrina M. has a team like that... she's got a huge team that's behind her, praying for her, helping her, encouraging her, and loving on her. Sabrina has been diagnosed for the THIRD time with a recurring breast cancer...she's had surgery, chemo and radiation and now she's starting it all over again. Why does this continue to haunt her? What is God trying to teach us through this? Like a baseball team struggling through a losing season, it sometimes seems as though we'll never catch up, never win...BUT, Sabrina has FAITH on her side. She believes that her God is a BIG God, and says that "He still does miracles and that He will never give me something that I can't handle". Faith is believing in things we can't see or understand. She has faith in her team... "My family and friends keep me going. It was pretty upsetting, being diagnosed the third time', but she presses on... with laughter, her bold and saucy attitude and a desire to win this fight. She may have three strikes, but this brave lady certainly hasn't lost the game.

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Making lemonade when given lemons....   |   Tuesday, August 24, 2010






Sometimes you're just dealt a crappy hand of cards and sometimes you're given a bunch of lemons, when you least expect it or deserve it. Stuff happens. BUT, how you play those cards or what you do with that produce, makes all the difference. You can just fold, sit out the hand or loose your shirt if you play foolishly... you can walk around with a sour attitude, blaming everyone and everything around you.... OR, you can make lemonade!

Meet good friends, Angie T. and Jennifer M. Buddies with cancer, opposite sides, but far from opposite attitudes. These women rocked the studio with laugher, joy and peace! Jennifer, a health care professional found her lump doing self-exams... she's a HUGE promoter of women doing exams... "I found this lump myself. Early detection promotes longer life!" She's adamant about women's health. She could be bitter and negative, "doing everything right. I'm healthy, active, ate right..." But she's made lemonade.
"I've learned not to be so hard on myself." And, she can speak from personal insight into the lives of the women in the health programs she develops.

Angie, a mother of two small children, is a woman of prayer and relies heavily on her faith to help her through this... "Prayer is powerful", she says. "You don't have to understand, just believe." The two women are trying to start a women's support group in their church for women who are diagnosed with cancer. "Sharing your weaknesses makes you stronger." They're making lemonade.
They want the atmosphere of the group to be fun and uplifting, silly and accepting. They wanted some 'fun' and 'silly' photos together to use for their brochures. They didn't have to 'pose' for these, they just were having fun and obviously care deeply about each other. They want women to know that they are not alone, that there is support and encouragement from women who have walked in their shoes. There will be other women to walk beside them during their journey...I think they'll do whatever they want and make the group happen... who knows, maybe they'll serve lemonade at their first meeting.

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Communicating with love....   |   Monday, August 23, 2010






I'm celebrating today as our numbers of hits on this blog site have exceeded 6000! We've grown exponentially, each day, now gaining between 300-500 hits! This is truly amazing and hopefully, will gain us the exposure to be able to reach our goal of making 200 women feel so Bold, so empowered and so Beautiful!! Thank you all so much for spreading the word about this site and these AMAZING women!! Let's keep it going. Share this with anyone you know.... they themselves might not be battling cancer, but THEY may know or work with someone who is! You never know who will cross your path each day, that might be secretly battling this horrible disease.

This bold, brave and beautiful woman communicates with more than her words... growing up with a deaf mother, Lorraine A. learned to sign at at early age and still continues to assist others in communicating by signing for others. Ironically, her mother also was afflicted with breast cancer.... Lorraine remembers her now deceased Mother, with tears in her eyes. Her Mom, who lost her hearing after spinal meningitis at 11 months old, and who also lost her own mother shortly after at age one, overcame all these obstacles to become a loving, active and communicative mother of 4 hearing children. Imagine never hearing the precious voices of your children, or hearing them say, "I love you Mom." Obviously a lot of love for her Mom and her courageous life's battles are contained in those tears. It's apparent that Lorraine has gleaned much of her courage and attitude from this mother who fought back against serious challenges. She tells me, 'I take each day as a gift, I try to enjoy today and not worry about tomorrow. I'm trying to enjoy each day to the fullest." She also talks about two other close friends who have already tramped through the journey of cancer and have come out the other side... who encourage her and are now helping her through her journey. The support of someone who has already gone through the fire is immeasurable. "They keep me positive." I suspect that memories of her mother keep her positive too....and daily give her the courage to make the most of every day, even though you might not 'hear' positive things, even though it might be difficult, even though she 'sees' a different body. As fire tempers metal, so the event's of our lives, temper us and make us stronger.

Have the courage to reach out to others around you. Really "HEAR" what they have to say. And for those of you on the other side of the battle.... reach out to someone coming behind you. They will appreciate the wisdom you might be able to share with them... or at least a shoulder to cry on.

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"I'm just an ordinary person...."   |   Saturday, August 21, 2010





Let me introduce a very BRAVE woman, Carmen W. She came to us, without the knowledge of anyone around her, not her husband, not her children, not her friends. She states, "I'm just an ordinary person... someones mother, wife, daughter, sister and granddaughter...I'm fighting the same fight that so many others are." As all these brave women are, they are fighting a battle inside too... although they ARE fighting cancer, they fight another battle within. Doubt. When your world comes crashing down with the diagnosis of cancer, she said she asked herself, " What did I do wrong?, Why me?, How can this be happening to me?" as probably most every one of these women. Doubt can be paralyzing. Doubt can cause us to question everything in life. Doubt can bring destruction. Carmen said she needed to participate in this project to do something proactive for herself and for the benefit of other women coming after her. She wanted to do it without telling anyone around her that she was doing it, and made it happen. After enjoying her free makeup application, including false eyelashes, she hesitantly entered the studio, not knowing what to expect, but hoping for something liberating to happen. After several images were taken and she was able to see herself in the back of the camera, she relaxed and a transformation occurred. I think she actually SAW herself as beautiful, even without hair. I believe that she could "SEE" with her heart, what others see about her.... that she IS beautiful and that she is very BRAVE. A gentle and soft-spoken woman, she is boldly moving through this journey with a quiet confidence that others see, and she is hopefully learning to see. I hope that she'll eventually share this experience with her family and friends so that they can continue to encourage her in her bold transformation! As she shows us here, "Attitude is everything... and lipstick helps!"

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NEWS FLASH!!   |   Friday, August 20, 2010


I was so excited, I couldn't wait till morning to tell everyone. We received a very generous donation today that will allow us to purchase an 11 x 14 mounted print for each of these very Bold, Brave and Beautiful women. Hopefully, the monies will continue to come in so that the Gala that we'd like to have to celebrate them, will also become a reality! Let's continue to spread the word to everyone that you know, so that we might still be able to reach and make 200 women feel BEAUTIFUL!

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"If I've got to go through this...."   |  





Good morning faithful followers! Today is a brighter day! I'm back in the swing of things and know that as Holly is laid to rest today, she'd want this project to move forward keeping her in our thoughts and knowing what a warrior she was!

I want you to meet a "light".... Channon M! She literally lights the room with her smile! Somehow it doesn't seem fair that a 26 year old should be facing breast cancer...but Channon doesn't let cancer define her, inhibit her or slow her down. She says, " I've got to go through this, so I might as well get something out of it. It's been an educational experience, not just for me, but for everyone around me. My co-workers have been absolutely amazing!" She brought a shirt that says, "I fight like a girl." And something about Channon tells me that she fights like someone who has a lot of life left in front of them! Someone fighting the battle of her life and that everything after this is downhill...she is a force to be reckoned with!
It always seems to be a common thread that runs through the lives of these women I meet... the support of family and friends is crucial to their survival. I'm convinced, if it weren't for my family and great friends, I wouldn't survive. They make me strive to be a better person.... I know these women are dependent on the people they love, that surround them to hold them up when they'd normally collapse under the weight of these devastating diagnoses. Her Mom knows full well the weight of bearing your children's pain... she'd would take this all on herself in a heartbeat if she could.... as we all as mothers' would rather bear the pain ourselves, rather than watch our children suffer. Channon's bright spirit and cheerful attitude have kept her going! She's anxious to get back to her job as a 911 dispatcher and is longing to get back onto her horse! "I have not been an easy case", Channon states, but it's my guess that her smile will make any Dr. want to get her back up on that horse as quickly as possible!

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Picking up the pieces and moving on...   |   Thursday, August 19, 2010


I'm gathering strength each day to move forward and try to remain positive. This so isn't like me and I'm not sure what the deal is... loosing a friend, loosing two friends, loosing someone my own age, feeling vulnerable, feeling helpless???
I need to keep my eyes on the prize, live my life to give back and move forward! I am reminded of the prayer we often see...
"Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can, and
the wisdom to know the difference." This is all something I can't change, but I do have the power to change some things... and I am more determined to make these women feel so good about themselves. And to make other women just starting their journey through cancer, feel brave and less afraid of the process.

Today's post is a 'teaser.' We have so many amazing and beautiful women to come over the next couple days, with incredible stories! I've got to get busy... I've only got a couple images to share this morning, but will have lots more to share over the next several days... stay tuned.

Please remember, there are some things in life we can't do a darn thing about, but there are so many others that we do have the power to control... our attitude is one. Be happy. Be content and love without restraint. Thank you all so much for standing by me through this very emotional struggle.

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We are products of our experiences. What are you?   |   Tuesday, August 17, 2010


As I sit to write this morning..... literally feeling like I'm picking up pieces of life and somehow trying to put them back together to build the 'puzzle' of my life, I'm thinking about this project and how it's shaping who I am and what I will become. How many things, events and people will affect who we become? What comments will shape our thoughts of ourself and our self image? Do we mirror positive or negative comments spoken about us, or defy those thoughts and strive for more?

I keep saying that this project is changing forever, who I am. Each of these women impart something that is somehow shaping my future, whether it's their own thoughts about their disease, how they cope with trials or comments about how they feel about their family. I KNOW that my health has become very important. What we generally take for granted, could change in one heartbeat. I KNOW that my family is the center of my universe and will only become more so. I WILL cherish each moment we share together. I KNOW that I will proceed with this project, giving all the skill and tenderness I have to make these women feel absolutely beautiful about themselves. I KNOW that I need to invest my time and heart in those relationships that are important to me. I KNOW that I will only listen to positive self thoughts. I KNOW that I can do anything that I put my mind to.... and it has become a reality in this project. I am EVOLVING into something new, shaped by each of these women.

I got a call from a woman last night, who is so dear to me.... she related that she and her co-workers, all women, read this blog every day and they are changed by it too. They discuss their annual checkup's and the need to be diligent about self-exams. They talk about the women and circumstances and how it relates to their lives. We are accomplishing EXACTLY what I set out to do...make women more aware of their bodies, less afraid of the process of exams and the big "C" word and less afraid to be 'real' with each other. I suspect that there are more people out there who are being changed by the lives of these women who are sharing this intimate journey of cancer and it's treatment. Thank you to those who are being so BOLD and BRAVE!
Keep sharing of yourselves, hug those you love, let the experiences in your life make you a better person, not a bitter person.

* Holly and Denise collaborated on a book over the past few years called, "An Udder Story- The Boob Book and Other Cancer Stories." Holly's 8 year old daughter Sydney did all the illustrations for the stories. Holly had it self-published and managed to get a final copy to Denise the week she died. I'm looking forward to reading it myself. Thus, the photo of them with the cow with the udder. We all had quite a laugh about it and it will always bring a smile to my face.

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Unspeakable tragedy... I'm still in shock...   |   Monday, August 16, 2010





I don't even know how to go about blogging about the events of Friday... we not only lost Denise A., our first Bold, Brave and Beautiful woman, but hours later, we lost Holly M. the gorgeous, young, vivacious woman photographed with her...
She died suddenly and obviously unexpectedly at home while gardening. She wasn't even sick, nor complained of anything.... she just died while gardening at her home in Rochester, Minnesota. She loved and cared for Denise enough, that she made the trek to Michigan for these photos.... and was devastated at the loss of Denise on Friday morning. She and I talked at 10:30am about Denise's passing and how we need to cherish life. She was so looking forward to spending the next 10 days with her husband and 8 year old daughter in their cabin in the UP. Just a few short hours later, I got the call that she was gone. I literally had to drive off the road and cry. I was and still am in shock. This just shouldn't happen. Not to someone so young and vital and energetic as Holly. Life truly is NOT FAIR!! I'm so sad for her husband and his little girl, that I can't even speak.
Cherish every moment with your families and loved ones. You NEVER KNOW when your last breath will take place.

Holly and Denise would want this project to move forward... to make more Bold and Beautiful women feel special. I'm committed to seeing this through to the end, despite this tragic weekend.
Please pray with me for both of these families...
Denise Acker, age 55, survived by her husband Morey and 2 son, and several grandchildren.
Holly Hunting Martin, age 48, survived by her husband Greg and her 8 yr. old daughter Sydney.

This has again, changed my life.

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